When the going gets tough, the tough get going...in People/Team management – Being the support you need.

When the going gets tough, the tough get going; we have heard this so many times. I for one thing even believed it blindly, when counselling others without actually knowing what it really meant. There are or will be some situations in our life that really test our mettle. These situations really test our limit, and bring out the real us in our life. The situations vary and the reasons could be different, emotional, financial, difficult relationships, loss of a loved one and so on. Irrespective of the situation, the way we feel while going through them is the same. It is as if everything in life has come to a grinding halt. It is as if we are alone on the planet, someone is trying to take revenge with us, as if some unknown force is hell bent on breaking us.

I am sure you can relate to this feeling at some point or the other in life. This kind of feeling lasts for a brief period of time, probably even days at a stretch in some cases. It varies from person to person and is directly proportional to the intensity and degree of the situation that we face. Usually we are solely responsible in most of the cases; also sometimes there are factors beyond our control too. Whatever be the case, our normal reaction to the situation will be blaming us for the catastrophe. The next step would normally be contemplating things and different ways that could have avoided this mishap. This usually goes on and on in our mind, sometimes tiring us to the point of a nervous breakdown. These reactions are quite normal.

However, what we need to understand here is that this is the moment that we need our 100%. We need our self here more than anything else in the world. The above mentioned reactions, however normal it may be; doesn’t help see us through the debacle. On the other hand it just magnifies the meltdown. Most of the times it aggravates the pain more than that it is ordinarily warranted for.

Unfortunately, there is no short cut to this. We need to go through this each time we face such situations, without having a way around it. That is exactly the reason that we need to make sure that we are present for us when we need us the most. There is no better way than to collect and compose our self while going through the agony. The key point here is being the best person that you can rely on. Hence it is all the more crucial that we are present with our complete strength. The advice from friends, well wishers and experts is an added bonus. The fundamental thing is being able to control our state of mind, to act on the decision that we have arrived at.

You will be surprised at the ease with which you deal with the situation when you have your own support while facing it. You will realize that you are capable of adopting to new situations, make changes to your lifestyle, face life changing circumstances with confidence etc. In all, you will see a new dimension within yourself, a capability that you have never knew that existed. The learning out of the situation, however, is the most important as it translates as our experience in the due course of time.

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